Classic Penguins I Have A Big Ass So Even When I Half Ass Something The Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Made-to-Order Graphic Apparel — Bold & Comfortable
Real talk: life’s too short for boring clothes. This piece is DTG-printed on genuine Gildan® blanks — vivid colors, premium feel, zero compromises.
📸 What you see is a T-Shirt mockup, but don’t stop there — this design comes in 4 different styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Crewneck Sweatshirt & Hoodie. Choose your favorite and we’ll make it just for you.
The Good Stuff
- 🎨 Print That Pops — DTG-printed directly into the fabric. No cracking, no peeling — just bold, vivid color.
- 🧵 Buttery Soft Fabric — Gildan® Ultra Cotton & Heavy Blend. OEKO-TEX certified — safe on your skin.
- 👕 All-Day Comfort — Classic fit with taped seams and a tear-away label. Zero itch, zero irritation.
- 🇺🇸 US Cotton, Real Quality — Proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol. Feel good about what you wear.
Fabric Specs
- T-Shirt & Long Sleeve: 100% US cotton, 5.3–6 oz — soft, breathable, classic fit.
- Sweatshirt & Hoodie: 8 oz, 50/50 cotton/poly blend — cozy, durable, resists pilling.
- Note: Sport Grey contains a 90/10 cotton/poly blend for color consistency.
Your Perfect Match
Use the charts below to pick your ideal color and size:
Available Colors
Gildan 5000 — Unisex T-Shirt
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 36 in (91.4 cm) |
| M | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| L | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| 2XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 3XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 4XL | 34 in (86.4 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
Gildan 18000 — Unisex Sweatshirt
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) | 33.5 in (85.09 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) | 34.5 in (87.63 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) | 35.5 in (90.17 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) | 36.5 in (92.71 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) | 37.5 in (95.25 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) | 38.5 in (97.79 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) | 39.5 in (100.33 cm) |
Gildan 18500 — Unisex Hoodie
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) |
Gildan 2400 — Unisex Long Sleeve Tee
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27.95 in (71 cm) | 36.22 in (92 cm) | 33.46 in (85 cm) |
| M | 29.13 in (74 cm) | 40.16 in (102 cm) | 35.04 in (89 cm) |
| L | 29.92 in (76 cm) | 44.09 in (112 cm) | 36.61 in (93 cm) |
| XL | 31.1 in (79 cm) | 48.03 in (122 cm) | 38.19 in (97 cm) |
| 2XL | 31.89 in (81 cm) | 51.97 in (132 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 3XL | 33.07 in (84 cm) | 55.91 in (142 cm) | 39.37 in (100 cm) |
| 4XL | 33.86 in (86 cm) | 59.84 in (152 cm) | 38.98 in (99 cm) |
Tap a style above to view its chart. Measured laid flat.
- Use the color chart to explore your options.
- Check the size chart for measurements.
- Select, add to cart, and enjoy!
Shipping & Returns
- ✅ Crafted in: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 Standard US: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ Express US: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 International: 7–14 business days.
Every item is made to order just for you. Please verify your size using the chart above. We can’t accept returns for sizing errors, but we’re always here to help if something isn’t right.
🛒 Browse the collection at blankrebels.com. Every piece, premium quality.